I once believed forgiveness held the key to greater harmony in the world.

It's a notion ingrained in us, suggesting that forgiving others ultimately brings peace within ourselves.

Forgiveness is at the heart of many spiritual teachings, including the Bible.

Since we’ve pedestalised forgiveness, we do it for the sake of doing it because it’s what society deems as the noble thing to do…

Even when we say we've forgiven someone but don’t actually ‘feel’ it or have moved on from it.

Still, I acknowledge the beautiful gesture of forgiveness.

However, what often goes overlooked, and what I've found to be the genuine path to harmony, both outwardly and inwardly, is something else -

Understanding.

In times of turmoil, few seek to truly understand.

You don’t have to look too deeply at the world today to know that’s pretty accurate.

To understand is to put yourself in someone else’s shoes and try to view their model of the world.

What made them react that way?

What drove their choices?

When someone does something 'bad' to us it's easy not to look past the surface - but perhaps there is a big part of themselves that is unhealed, a childhood trauma, a conditioned belief deep in their subconscious that surfaced...

In seeking genuine understanding, we uncover a universal truth:

Everyone is doing their best to express love.

Whether it’s a love for power, a love for something in return, a love for greed, a love for revenge, a love for their belief, a love for their people, etc…it’s all an act of love.

Everybody is trying to show love but the problem is this -

Many don’t know HOW to love - the type of love that is closer to its pure form and not in its distorted, toxic form.

Simply because they are not taught how so they spend their lives figuring it out by looking externally instead of going within.

This concept may be challenging to accept. How could someone who inflicts harm act out of love?

Especially when that harm affects us or those we deeply care about?

Understanding doesn't diminish the pain and suffering caused to others.

It doesn’t mean that hurting someone is ‘okay’.

Understanding doesn’t mean you have to agree with someone or tolerate their behaviour.

Rather, the journey toward understanding is a path of self-discovery and healing.

It is looking at the relationship someone has with themselves, which moves to the relationship we have with them, to ultimately, the relationship we have with ourselves.

We can never fully know and experience ourselves until we can learn to know and experience someone else.

When we feel someone's joy, or when we feel their pain and suffering, we get to know ourselves better.

Life is about relationships.

So every relationship we have with someone, with nature, with things…is an opportunity to know Who We Really Are.

This is why I believe God is non-judgemental because he already understands for us.

A world built on understanding, I believe from my own experiences, is a better world.

"Understanding replaces forgiveness in the mind of the Master." - Neale Donald Walsch